i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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