is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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