He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
