One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She even gives head with a lisp.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
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