There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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