Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Randomize
