If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
