I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
