Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
