I'm really into asian looking animals
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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