Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
