my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
