All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize