Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
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