why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
