i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
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