i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
