I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
