ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
