Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
