She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
