she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize