my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
