At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize