If that was your dad, he is hot
Me. At least after what I've been through.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
