wake up i wanna do it froggy style
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
BRING THE BAGELS
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
