sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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