Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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