I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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