Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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