I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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