butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i love accidental penises.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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