He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
