I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
