Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
