ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize
