yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
