i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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