Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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