it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
