I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
