Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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