you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize