Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize