you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
