I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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