so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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