My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
