Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize