you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize