this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
